I Am Halloween Candy’s Bitch

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Halloween Is Tomorrow!

I am already thinking of what candies I can take from my girls, after their labors of Trick – or – Treating tomorrow night.   I do not consider myself to have a  huge sweet tooth, but I’m looking forward to seeing these little guys tomorrow night.  They are like the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow.  When I see these little guys, it’s like an angelic choir of yumminess for my mouth.

My Favorite
My Favorite

 

Who are we kidding?  This is what I’m going to see in my girls Halloween bags…

My Least Favorite
My Least Favorite

The red headed step child of Halloween candy.  The junk.  The crap.  The rejects of the night.  You know the candies you would snort in 5th grade, and it would burn the whole way up to your brain, and you brain would ask you …”what the hell is she doing now?  That idiot!”  Maybe that is why I hate them so much.

 

Then there are these little peewees…

candy corn
Candy Corn

My girls love Candy Corn.  Me?  They make my teeth hurt just looking at the picture.  They make my tummy hurt too.  It’s the 8th wonder of the world, how they get pure sugar to stick together in this formation.  These are what you get when people think you are too old to be trick – or – treating.

 

Let’s not forget this amazing tiny morsels….

RUNTS
RUNTS

Another treat for sure!  Do they even make these anymore? The pink and yellow ones were my favorite. 🙂

 

Let’s see.  Who ever got a shit-ton of these little snacks?

Pixy Stix
Pixy Stix

Oh gosh…my brain is on sugar overload just thinking about them.  Admit it…2nd or 3rd grade, these guys were the shiz!

 

Come on now?  You don’t think I would forget about these little comedians….

Laffy Taffy
Laffy Taffy

These guys are fun by themselves, but when you try and share the joke that comes on the package, while you are trying to chew a mouthful of pure goodness?  Amazing!  Forget about any manners….just read me the joke so I can spit all over. Love these guys.

*Question:  Where do you find a naked frog?

*Answer:  Under a horny toad!

 

This next one would be my second favorite of all time!

Sweet Mercy
Sweet Mercy

Not the chocolate tootsie rolls, but VANILLA tootsie rolls.  They are few and far between, and I love them. Who else love these?  Who else wants to hug them, love them, squeeze them, and call them Herman?  Don’t be shy.

 

And finally….

Dum Dums
Dum Dums

I actually don’t mind these.  They come in awesome flavors, and they aren’t so big that your jaw and cheek start to hurt when you store them in the side of your mouth.  These guys get a bonus, for not having that crap chocolate tootsie crap in the middle too.  It’s a win, win for these dum dums!

 

What are some of your favorite candies?  What age is too old to go trick – or – treating?  Do you feel safe sending your kids out?

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